Around 10 years or so ago, I got invited into a group DM chat with some people I met on Twitter, I had always loved apple, tech and apps etc, but this was really the first time I was exposed to the many others that shared my same interests.
That also ignited something inside me that had wanted to create my own group like that, my own chat community, so I did.
I believe the first one started in twitter itself as well, or possibly it may have been slack, either way over the next ten years or so, the group I had created moved and tried every chat app out there. I mean ALL of them. Every time a new chat app came out, we tried it, anytime a chat app had an update, we tried it.
In doing so I realized that running a chat group with many different people was a lot harder then it looked, especially for someone who has some anxiety issues.
I would get DMs from people, “hey I don’t like telegram, let’s try WhatsApp”, or “hey, let’s use slack it has all the different channels”, or “hey, that’s cool if you guys wanna use WhatsApp but I won’t because I don’t like Facebook”, or “hey Twitter is cool but I use a third party twitter app so I can’t see group chats”.
Day in and day out there would be at least one person bitching or adding comments, and then as I had anxiety I would just listen to that one person and move the whole group, or shut everything down, I have done that more times than I can count, people will message me and say where did the group go, and I have deleted it, alienating people and featuring the groups, even though that didn’t really do much to help my anxiety because then everyone would message me, “where did the group go?”, “you’re selfish, why not just delete the apps off your phone?” And I was made to fell why should I worry about my needs when I could just delete the app and keep the groups open, the truth is when I did that, I would get FOMO fear of missing out and then eventually come back.
So here I was last weekend, in the same boat, people wanting to use one app or another, still getting DMs etc, my anxiety through the roof, in addition to everything else that’s going on in society right now.
So that’s when it hit me, I messaged a few people I talk to in the chat groups all the time, and I said I wanna have an iMessage group are you interested. And for the most part people said yes, there were a few I was interested in keeping more contact with that said no, but there is nothing I can do about that.
I started using it on sat and I have to say it’s been great, I can still keep in touch with the people I talk with most often, and being a small group it’s easy to stay caught up, everyone’s talking, and participating, because in most large chat groups if you have 300 people only a few chat, most just consume, and the ones that only consume and don’t participate and usually the first ones to complain about something, or have an issue, so nobody is bitching about moving from this app to another, and it’s working great.
I should have done this years ago, the only small issues are supposedly being addressed in iOS 14, a chat marker, so you know where you left off and the ability to @ people in a group chat.
So in closing, I won’t be using chat apps anymore, im much less stressed, I’m not anxious that I’m missing out on anything, and I’m glad I have met all of you guys, I’ll be talking with you via iMessage or via Twitter in the future.